Christ

4 Years Ago Today

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4 years ago I made a decision that I must make not just one time, but every single day of my life

Four years ago today, I recommitted my life to Christ.

Before that, I was a model church kid, involved long before I can actually remember. I went to Sunday School until I had aged out, sung in the choir, volunteered at VBS, and tried to do everything I was “supposed” to do. I had believed in God since I was old enough to verbally say so. Over the years of childhood, I had moments of doubt and faith. By my teen years though, regardless of what I was doing or not doing, my faith would more accurately be described as knowledge of God, rather than a relationship with Him. On this day four years ago, that began to change.

It was at a retreat in New Hampshire. Somewhat ironically, I was a “leader” and not a youth group kid. I was a sophomore in college trying to figure out what the heck I was doing with my life. I happened to be friends with the youth director at my church and I was well versed (pun somewhat intended) in the Bible, so she wanted me to come along as a leader. I thought I’d be helping wrangle kids, I didn’t expect to come away any different. I don’t remember exactly what the speaker said, but I remember praying to God in a way I hadn’t before and recommitting myself to Him. I came home with a rekindled faith and a renewed hope.

In a journal entry right after I returned home, I wrote:

…The strangest thing happened even before the retreat. For me, anxiety has been a way of life lately…When it came to this retreat however, I felt no anxiety…During the entire weekend, I felt an incredible peace. All I can say is that God was there. I did not feel any anxiety. It was one of the most freeing things ever.

Anxiety had been a major part of my life in the years preceding this retreat. Some days it made it almost impossible to function as a ‘normal’ adult. Even simple tasks like ordering lunch could be a challenge. A weekend without anxiety was like a drink of fresh, cool water after a long, strenuous walk in the desert.

I’m not going to say that everything changed right after that. In fact, I still struggle with some of the things I was struggling with at that point in time, including anxiety. Some days are just as hard if not more so than the times before the retreat. Sometimes I feel really down on myself that things haven’t changed as much as I would have liked. Still, God has been, is, and will remain faithful. He has shown me things in His word, given me peace in raging storms, and been a rock that doesn’t move even when everything in my life seems to be changing for the worse. In the clearer moments, I know that God will do with me according to His time and His will, not my own selfish, impatient desires. His love, power, and mercy are not dependent on me or my feelings.

The day I recommitted my life to Christ wasn’t the end. It wasn’t a one time decision fueled by the fun, excitement, and engaging conversations of a weekend retreat. In fact, I’ve had to learn the hard way that I need to make this decision every single day of my life. My heart is fickle, and many times it doesn’t want to follow Jesus. Thankfully, God’s love doesn’t shift with circumstances, feelings, or whims. Lamentations 3:22-23 says it better than I ever could:

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

On this day four years ago, some things started to change in my heart and life because of our faithful, never-changing God. Many things still need to and will change. In all things, God is faithful. He who began a work in me, before I was born, on this day four years ago, and every day of my earthly existence so far, will bring it to completion. Thanks be to God.

What is Peace?

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peace

Peace. We hear this word thrown around a lot. It’s sung in music, written on t-shirts, talked about on TV, and offered as a greeting. Yet usually when this term is tossed out, it is merely a wishful thought in a world filled with more violence, turmoil and hate then we can even fully comprehend or fathom.

The dictionary says that “peace” is a period in which there is no fighting, a time of security, a state of concord. The world sets this “peace” as a lofty goal on a pedestal. We are told that if we just reach a little farther, work a little harder, and hope a little stronger, we can obtain it.

The problem is that this “peace” the world gives is an unreachable hope that never lasts. Even in so-called “peacetime” eras between official wars, there is plenty of strife on the streets and in homes, much of which goes unreported and unheard except by the victims. And of course even when there is peace among governments or neighbors, there is still  inner conflict hidden within the walls of every person’s chest cavity and skull.

The world says that “peace” is a lack of conflict, but “peace” means something different in God’s word. After all, the apostles certainly didn’t live lives free of conflict but instead were faced with jail, slander, and indescribable brutalities.

Knowing full well what strife his disciples would face after the ascension, Jesus tells them “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you” (John 14:27, ESV). He takes this thought a little further in John 16:33 saying “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

So what peace is Jesus referring to, if it isn’t a life free from trouble? There are no words to adequately describe it, as Philippians 4:7 says that the peace of God “surpasses all understanding.” Still, there are words to help us identify what this peace is. Ephesians 2:14 says that Jesus is our peace. Our relationship with him, and through him God the Father, is our peace. We have been reconciled to Him and we belong to Him both in our life and in our death. No earlthy strife can take us from Him. As Isaiah 54:17 says, “no weapon that is fashioned against [us] shall succeed.”

This peace is resting in God’s sovereignty even when the storms of life are raging and chaos seems to be reigning. This is why the peace that Jesus gives is “not as the world gives;” it is a peace that remains and survives even in bitter outer conflict. This peace is sweeter and more filling than any “peace” the world tries to dish up. This peace allows us to live in freedom that only Christ can give us.

This all sounds wonderful, doesn’t it? Of course, in reality life doesn’t usually feel like this. Peace sometimes seems unattainable at best. Life is full of stress and worry, and I fall victim to this as much as anyone. In fact, lately my anxiety has been even worse than usual because of my dad’s recent cancer diagnosis and a boss that gets on my nerves at work. How more wonderful is it, then, to know that God’s promises and His gifts are not reliant on human feelings? He gives His peace to us as an unmerited gift every moment. We just have to accept it, and allow Him to change our focus from earthly stress to His promises.

I’m still learning to live in this peace and freedom. I will need to continually be reminded of these promises for as long as God grants me breath. Yet in these struggles, He is still sovereign and this peace is unwavering just like His love for us.

Knowing this, let our prayer for ourselves and each other be as Paul says in Colossians 3:15; that the peace of Christ will rule our hearts, even in a world filled to the brim with every type of conflict.

The Mountains and Our Stories

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IMG_2330.JPG

I just came back from a wonderful weekend in the mountains of Maine. Looking at the mountains, everything looks absolutely beautiful. The trees, the sky, the water below, everything. That’s the big picture and it’s beautiful. As I stood in awe of this part of IMG_2300creation, I started to think about how this stunning display of nature was formed. What about all the time it took for the mountains to take their present shape or for the little seedling trees to grow into massive forests? What about all the dirt that allows those trees and all the other plants to grow? What about all the dead and rotting plants and animals that nourish that soil and make it fertile? What about all the creepy, crawly bugs at the bottom of the food chain that are bothersome to us but vital to the entire ecosystem? The mountains are a messy place when you’re at the micro level, but the big picture is breathtaking.

Perhaps our own stories are similar. Our lives have plenty of dirt. Plenty of dead things (or things that IMG_2458should die). Plenty of mess. Sin creeps and crawls in our minds and hearts. Some things in our lives (like pride, lust, hatred, etc.) need to die for better things to take place. Our lives are covered in filth from our sin. Yet the big picture is God’s glorious masterpiece that He is creating in all of His children. God meets us at the micro level, in our sin, in our dirt. He doesn’t finish there though. Over time, He grows good things in us. In time, he makes us His masterpiece.

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:10, ESV)

We live at the micro level. We see all the dirt. In time though, and through the dirt, God does wonders. We can’t always see it from our perspective on the ground, but in the long run, God does amazing things through His people. The big picture is God’s glorious work in us.  Even the dirty, bothersome, and dangerous things have a purpose. We are a masterpiece of His design and in His time.

Let Easter Change your Everyday

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Today we celebrate Easter. We celebrate our risen Lord and Savior. Death has lost its sting and Christ is alive!

In the hustle of church, Easter egg hunts and family dinners, let us take a moment to really remember the reason we celebrate. Jesus rose from the dead! He lives forever more! He suffered, bled and died and his blood has washed us clean as snow. Those of us who trust in him will also live. The chains of sin that held us down are broken. Our shackles lay in pieces at the foot of the cross where love died. This is not something to be taken for granted. Easter is one day, but the reason we celebrate is a reason to live everyday. Let Easter change our everyday, and not just this one Sunday. After all, today is just one day. But the reason we celebrate it is forever.

Happy resurrection Sunday!

Questions

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In any Christian’s life, questions will arise. Asking questions can be scary. Often these questions are complex with no easy to understand answer. In some Christian circles, the asking of questions is even frowned upon because of the tension and doubt that often accompanies such questions.

Questions are not a bad thing though. Questions are a major part of learning and growing. As young children we learned a great deal simply by asking questions of our parents, teachers, and others. In school, teachers generally encourage questions relating to course material. Having childlike faith doesn’t mean you don’t question. Children are naturally curious and ask questions. People in the Bible had questions so it is no surprise that modern day followers of Christ do too.

When we ask questions about faith related issues however, we must remember that we may not always get the answer we want to hear. Sometimes we may not get any answer at all (at least in this life). As a young child sometimes asks his or her parents a question that he or she cannot fully understand the answer to, so we may ask questions of our Father in Heaven that we cannot fully understand the answers to. Many young children eventually ask their parents a question somewhere along the lines of “where do babies come from.” Most parents are going to give a simple answer such as “from mommy’s tummy” rather than going into the details of how sex works and how a baby forms in the womb. Young children do not need to know those details nor can they fully comprehend them. The same is true for us when we ask our Heavenly Father certain questions. Some things are not meant for us to know or understand right now.

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.” (Proverbs 3:5)

In those moments when no simple answer is to be found, as in every moment, we must trust in God. His knowledge and understanding surpass our wildest imagination. There are some questions we may not fully understand the answers to, but we can trust that our Father knows what we can or cannot understand at any given moment and that He will work all things for our good.

The Parable of the Sower, the Soil of our Hearts, and the Ultimate Gardener

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In Matthew 13 and Luke 8 and Mark 4, we read one of Jesus’ many parables: the parable of the sower. I’ve always thought of this parable as solely referring to when someone first hears the Gospel, whether it be in church, in a conversation with a friend or stranger, or elsewhere. Someone preaches the gospel and people react differently. Sometimes the receivers of the word never have a chance to grow in faith or in a relationship with Christ like the seed on the path didn’t have a chance to grow. Other times, like the seed in the rocks, people hear the message and rejoice…until trouble comes. Like the seed in the thorns, some people gleefully accept the word but the word is then choked out by the cares of the world. Finally, some accept the word and develop a relationship with God. They serve Him and preach His word to countless others.

As Christians it’s easy to assume that we are in the good soil because we have accepted Jesus. The sowing of seed, that is God’s word, is not a one-time occurrence that happens when we first learn of Jesus however. If we are truly following Christ, then the word is being sewn in us on a very regular basis. The seed is sewn in our hearts every time we read and study our Bibles, go to church or Bible study, and every time we pray. Sometimes we are too distracted by everything going on around us and the word we hear or read doesn’t have soil to take root. This is when we just go through the motions of reading the word rather than letting it sink in and applying it. Sometimes we gladly accept the words we read or hear but the stresses, worries and trials of life lead us to forget the promises God made. Other times we accept the word at church or study but temporary pleasures distract us and choke out the message we’ve heard. We are all highly susceptible to distraction and God’s word does not always fall on fertile soil in our hearts. Satan comes at us with all he has and though God is way more powerful, we tend to give into Satan’s deceptive tactics.

My good friend Layla added some more insight to this parable when I was discussing my thoughts with her. Even the healthiest of plants in the richest of soil has hard days. There are days when the plant will wilt in the sun or whither in the cold. Yet the plant still comes back, especially with the loving care of a gardener. Weeds may creep up around it sometimes but a gardener will make sure to pull them out. Like the plants growing in a garden are taken care of by a gardener, our Heavenly Father takes care of us. We can come to Him and ask Him to cultivate the soil in our hearts to receive His word. There will be times when, like the plants, we wilt under stress and suffering in this life or we begin to be suffocated by cares of this world. We still have that “life seed” in us even when we fail however. After all, God’s grace is sufficient for us in all circumstances. As followers of Christ we should of course want to grow in our relationship with God however. In order for this relationship to grow and thrive, we must allow God to cultivate our hearts and remove the things that hinder our growth in Him. Sometimes it is painful as God prunes away the parts of us that keep us from Him. Even in those times, we must trust that He, the One who formed us and loves us, knows what He is doing. Our heavenly Father truly is the ultimate gardener in the soil of our hearts.

Don’t Take the Christmas Story for Granted

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It’s Christmas and it’s a time when family traditions thrive. Over the years, we get rather accustomed to the traditions of the season. The special dinners, the fresh baked cookies, decorating the tree, the candlelight church service, opening presents Christmas morning…

We also become very accustomed to hearing the basic Christmas story of Jesus being born of the Virgin Mary and placed in a manger. We’re accustomed to hearing of the shepherds, wise men, and angels. We see it visually in the small nativity scenes on the mantle or in the yard. We hear it in the sermon at church. We hear of it in carols. Perhaps we even read it ourselves. Even many who have little to no experience with church or Christianity in general know the story. Perhaps because it is so familiar or perhaps because we are just so accustomed to it, especially in this country, we take the true Christmas story for granted most of the time. I’m guilty of this too. When we take the story for granted, we miss out on the overwhelming display of love and God’s character that is revealed in just the physical arrival of our Savior on this earth some 2000 years ago.

Jesus left a paradise better than ANY earthly paradise you can think of and came to the earth in the form of a baby. Jesus left a place free of suffering to come into the world where there is an endless supply of physical and emotional suffering. People both rich and poor must face suffering but the impoverished often face additional plights. Jesus was born into a life of poverty where he surely faced some physical discomfort. He could have come in the form of an independent adult king and the simple fact that he came down from heaven for us would still be astounding. He takes it steps further by coming in the form of a baby that needed its mother’s nurturing. He was born under harsh (and rather unsanitary) conditions and placed a feeding trough for animals. I mean seriously! The Savior of the world…the King of Kings…came into the world as a dependent baby, was born in a smelly stable, and laid not even in a cradle but in a borrowed feeding trough. Just take a moment for that to sink in.

From day one Jesus could identify with the plights of humans. He was born right into the mess of this world. He came to get messy. He came to deal with the mess we made and the sin we bore. The story of Jesus’ birth is not some trivial story but rather a crucial piece of the overall picture of God’s extraordinary, unfathomable love for His people. This Christmas I pray that you and I take some time to be in awe of our wonderful God and the event that we celebrate with traditions and fanfare. May we never take Jesus’ birth for granted.

Modern Culture’s Opinion vs. God’s Definition

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Our modern culture looks at “church” as perfectly painted steeples and pews in perfect order with a band at the altar.

But truly church is a people and this people is broken beyond the all the remedies this world has to offer.

Our modern culture sees “worship” as a concert and short sermon once a week.

But truly worship is what we do and think each and every day, not just a single hour on Sundays.

Our modern culture calls the Bible irrelevant in the modern era; nothing more than stories and some good advice.

But truly the Bible is God’s word and His word does not change.

Our modern culture likes to focus on the “love, peace and acceptance” part of Christianity.

But truly God’s definition of these words is quite different from the world’s.

Our modern culture labels anyone that goes to church and owns a Bible a Christian.

But truly being a Christian is more than going through the motions and is about developing a relationship with our Heavenly Father.

Psalm 95:1

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Psalm 95:1

I ended up making this tonight. It didn’t turn out how I originally planned but I think it actually turned out better! I’m actually using it as an avatar on one of my twitter accounts!

The Pain He Endured

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On Good Friday, we commemorate the day that our Savior Jesus was crucified. In the ultimate sign of love, Jesus laid his life down so that we may be saved. He suffered more than I can fully comprehend. Still, I’ve heard some people say that Jesus’ death was not anything really special or unique. Lots of people have been killed for various causes. Lots of people have been crucified. Heck, even when Jesus was crucified, two other men were crucified with him! Death by crucifixion could last from several hours to even several days, but Jesus was only on the cross for a few hours. At times I’ve even caught myself thinking that Jesus’ death was not anything spectacular. But in reality, several things differentiate his death from the deaths of other martyrs and victims of crucifixion.

The most obvious difference is of course the fact that Jesus was innocent of all crimes. He was perfect and sinless. Even one of the men crucified with Jesus recognized this fact. None of us can say the same. Romans 3:23 says “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Even the saints and the people we honor for their contributions to society have fallen short. We all deserve to die. Romans 6:23 states “ For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Jesus was sinless and yet he paid the price that we should have had to pay.

Obviously the physical suffering of Jesus was extreme. He was brutally whipped, forced to carry a rugged (and heavy) cross through the streets, had thorns pushed into his head and finally nailed and lifted up on a cross. Crucifixion is one of the most excruciating means of execution. Still, others have been whipped and crucified throughout history. While we remember the physical suffering that Jesus experienced, we must also remember the emotional pain he experienced before and during his crucifixion.

While Jesus was human and experienced physical torture, he was also God and knew things that others did not. While Jesus physical torture was perhaps not exceptionally long in duration, the emotional pain he experienced before the day he was crucified was long and excruciating. Imagine knowing the exact way you will die. Imagine having to continue to work despite knowing the pain you will be inflicted with in the near future. Imagine walking into the city knowing that later that week you will be betrayed by your friend, beaten, crucified, and abandoned by many of those you love. If these thoughts don’t churn your stomach, I’m not sure what will. If I knew these things, I’d probably be crippled with fear and unable to continue doing anything. Yet Jesus continued to teach, serve, and love people, even the one he knew would betray him. As the hour of his crucifixion drew nearer, we see that Jesus was distraught by what was coming. In Mark 14:34, Jesus says to his disciples, “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death. Remain here and watch.” Luke 22:44 says “And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like drops of blood, falling down to the ground.” Even though Jesus knew what must be done and that he would live again, he was still very troubled. He even asked that this awful cup of suffering awaiting him would be taken away.

While on the cross, as life slowly left his human body, Jesus was thinking of each of us. He knew that many would reject him even after he paid the price of our sins. He knew that sin would still fill the world for years, centuries, and beyond. He knew things far beyond our comprehension. If you watch the news, you hear of horrible things going on all over the world. There are bombings, shootings, stabbings…the list goes on and on. It can make us feel sick. Even with the technology we have now and all the media, we still only know a small fraction of the pain and suffering in this world. God knows all that has happened, all that is happening, all that will happen. I can’t even imagine the pain that God must feel seeing the suffering that people, his own creation, has inflicted on themselves and each other.

Despite all the physical and emotional pain, Jesus still laid down his life for us. His love is beyond human comprehension. So as we mark another Good Friday today, let us remember how much our savior loved us and how much he went through so that we could have a relationship with God. Let us also remember that the cross is not the ending though. The cross is nothing without the resurrection but that is another blog post.